June 22nd, 2003 · 15 comments

I fall in love too easily and get carried away with notions, usually negative ones. I’m accidentally obnoxious for no good reason and continually infuriated with my own inarticulacy. I absolutely hate the fact that I exist as a physical presence. I am not the sum of my past! … I am utterly tedious. {- mirror in the shape of a girl}
my whole is like an ocean; my outside does not fit my inside. (my inside does not fit.) my breathing, which is sometimes ragged (and sometimes not), is heavy here, and wide. this is the sky of me, the storm of me. my hollow bird fingers, chanting. my moon eyes that well and shift. (this hair like long, thin filaments, winding around and through.)

my secret mouth. my water heart.

if you said to me, you are more like a vast and quiet planet, i would tell you about the corners of my mouth and how they curl upwards (& sometimes down). this mess of wor[l]ds; this comet smile. how my eyes open wide to fix on your mouth (which is sometimes moving, and sometimes not). &my hands; how one or the other is always fluttering. near to my face. over my stomach.

i would tell you about the tilt of my head and the way i will crash into you again and again because. (i am too busy trying not to crash. into anyone else.)

&oh. i would tell you about this boy. this boy.

his altar of old lace. his laughter like rain.

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